1. I just don't get it. how can people compare between others with a certain standard, an expectation, that doesn't apply to themselves. What happened to "do unto others, as you would like others to do to you" ? We all judge people by our own standards without thinking. And it ends up with people at each others throats. and all for nothing but a lack of anger control. This applies to me as well.
2. Saw the black knights flying in formation after i left AMKhub. there was an outing there. Anyway. that moment was sort of a representation of what may/will come. Jets in the sky on Saturdays. Are my saturdays ever going to be free? But still. seeing the jets, and saying that, "hey. I know those jets. Touched them b4. and spent whole days learning beside them/about them" There is some pride there. =)
3. I don't know what is my stand on this now. I feel glad that things are clear, and even if desperate measures were taken, I don't think coldness is a counter for it. It merely amplifies rage, bitterness and hurt till they take over. I wish i knew you better not to screw simple things like communication up. Perhaps i'm not trying hard enough to fix things back. then, I'm sure of one thing. No matter what, I'll always be there if you need me. Just cause, well, just cause i bother to and i want to.
4. I'm neither a good conversationalist, nor proactive, nor some good looking chap. I wonder if a lack of all 3 factors will affect the way i interact with people heavily. Maybe i should work towards fixing at least the conversationalist part. Or maybe i'm paranoid. I'm quite sure that i'm not very polite and not very subtle in my delivery of lines. Still that same thing. Think b4 your speak. Easy to say, hard to do.
5. Driving is worrying me. I'm at lesson 12 and at module 18. another 15 more modules. But can i finish them in 6 more lessons? 4th august looms closer.
6. I'm in serious need of tlc. Everyone's either been taking advantage of my passiveness, or taking me for granted. Specifically, some nice people have been giving care. But sadly not tender nor loving enough. Not that i'd like tender and loving coming from them. But nevermind! 1.5 years is enough time to start caring. especially since we have to depend on each other a lot. Reading this you might think i'm being a selfish spoilt brat. All humans are in some way.
And this is the only thing i need to get by. and i feel i'm not getting enough of it. I'm so sick and tired of the verbal snide remarks, sarcasm, cynicism towards me EVERYDAY since who noes when. so can you blame me?
7. dude, thanks for helping me run my errand and claiming my warrranty. But then, the bad news is. I just chucked my mp3 into the washing machine. Shyt. Yes, i'm blur. fullstop. Don't pry further. I survived for 7 months with that mp3, oni to chuck it into the water with my pants. sad sad. yeap, i'm consoling myself with my fixed earphones. T-T. Which explains that flurry of yelling by my parents and me ( refer to 1. ) I might have to really use my bank account for this.
8. Air force is allowing coveralls to be worn to and from work. Which means, i dun have to wear my No. 3. I know people say No. 3 uniform from air force looks really smart. but mine is so uncomfortable. The need to adjust the uniform all the time is a real dampener. And coveralls display all your affliations with large shoulder and chest patches! (and hide my extra tyres LMAO. wish i could laugh it off. shyt LOL) I think the coveralls to showoff and for convenience sake only. Okay the safety boots are steel-capped and will armour your feet, so that if you kick a large stone, you won't yell too loud.
9. I fixed my laptop. After 2 weeks of trying to figure why without programs installed i oni had 1 out of the total 50 GB of ram. Apparently there's a inbuilt program that saves backup states from previous dates. Namely from 2006, when my bro flooded this laptop with heavy gaming. So all the gaming and files took up space as saved files. I dun have a backup now since i deleted those old saves for space. but i got 2 different programs protecting my com now =) Should get a HDD with large capacity for saving.
10. you know what? go on. tell me about yourself. tell me about your troubles. tell me about what you think. tell me about what you do or did. I want to know everything about what's happening in your life. and i'll tell you mine in return. Aren't friends mostly MADE that way? if i keep talking about what i think, it would just mean that i'm a loudmouth-ed irritation of an acquaintance. not really someone you bother about. this means YOU who bothers to read this dead blog. Of couse, ask me out for a coffee or a walk in a park or smth b4 you unload please. my platter is rather empty. which is why i love being paranoid and blowing it up! no lah. Just kidding. mostly.
11. (10 cont'd) if not, then nvm. i get the message. I'll shutup and pretend i don't know you. tch.
12. My instructors recently were planning where to go during last week's friday off. Apparently kushinbo sounded nice. except i was doing some admin stuffs nearby. whilst they started discussing how that advertisement's song went. "dom dom dom, one 2 three, we are kushinbo.. dom dom..."
me: what the??
guess everyone's human.
I'm just a singer, you're the world
all i can bring you.. is.
